I signed up for Tara Lazar's Picture Book Idea Month with no reservation this year. Coming up with ideas is the most fun part of the process for me. It's low pressure, right? Nobody ever needs to see what you write or draw in your notebook. Here is the dinky, little notebook I've been toting around with me that I now love and treasure:
Days 1-5 were a blast...ideas were flowing to the point where I actually forgot a few fleeting ones (which lead to another potentially bad idea - an idea goblin who hoards good ideas and never uses them!) Day 6 was alright, but I could feel my confidence slipping. Surely and shortly thereafter, Days 7-8 were a total bomb.
My internal children's book red flag went up "BAD IDEA, BAD IDEA, STUPID! STUPID!" and as soon as it did, every single word I inked with my marker pen made absolutely no sense. Disjointed thoughts, going nowhere. (I.E. A flower with the name, Binky):
As soon as I started to think about sharing my ideas and turning them into dummies or full stories - I got nervous. I froze. "These ideas aren't good enough." "There are people out there making way more creative and meaningful stories than these...and THAT is what I want to write."
Hate is a strong word, but I have a serious love/hate relationship with my inner voice.
I imagine my inner voice as a wilting, grumpy old man with an underbite and thick glasses (for some reason). It would be better if he were an animal - a big, brown bear. He is the one who keeps me from excelling. He keeps me away from my flowing thoughts and makes me check Twitter for inspiration. He blocks whatever passage in my brain it is that lets the ideas flow through with his cynicism. However, he is also what made me stop and write this blog post.
And he just gave me an idea for Day 9.
Cheers and happy writing/drawing to all my PiBoIdMo friends!